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Ambiel Childers Consider yourself one of the audience lala kent and Randall EmmettThe now infamous sex tape.
“I looked at the tape and I saw it and my whole life stopped,” Childers, 37, said on Friday, Jan. 9, the premiere episode of her and Kent’s The Impossible . podcast. “It wasn’t about what I was seeing. It was more about the complete realization that I had abandoned myself forever.”
childers is Married to Emmett, 54, from 2009 to 2017during which time they welcomed daughters London and Riley. Emmett moved on with Kent, now 35, during their divorce. The filmmaker, who split from Kent in October 2021, welcomed daughter Ocean a few months ago. (Kent welcomed her second child, daughter Sousa, in 2024 via a sperm donor.)
“You look great in the tape,” Childers quipped Vanderpump Rules alum. “Watching this tape, it’s not seeing the behavior that’s happening. I’m seeing my life flashing in front of me, like, I’m seeing everything. You’re looking at something, but you’re not looking at something, like, your brain is showing you different reels of what’s going on in your life.”
According to Childers, watch Emmett and Kent Video Make her realize her marriage is over.
“It never felt safe to leave. It was a threat to everything I had built,” she recalls. “I’ll never forget, after that tape, after seeing what I saw, I just kind of woke up in that moment. I was like, ‘If you don’t leave, you’re going to die.’ I felt like I was so deeply involved in this relationship… For some people, it’s hard to explain. They’re like, ‘Stupid bitch, let’s go.'”
Childers initially stayed married for the sake of London and Riley.
“I tell people I stay because of my children. I don’t want my daughters to grow up in a broken home.” you the alum recalled. “I didn’t know what that experience was like, and I didn’t want that. I realized in that moment, I was like, ‘Okay, I have to get out. It’s like I have to save myself for my kids.’ … Because if I’m not here, the kids can’t breathe, they can’t breathe the oxygen in the house. I think they’re really breathing the oxygen of their mother.”
Childers further stated that she felt “half dead” when the marriage ended.
“I took drugs to numb my feelings, just to suppress all the feelings inside me because I didn’t know what to do,” Childers said. “I had no way out. My only way out at that point was action.”
childers and kent After that both of them moved on From Emmett.
“The fact that you can go out and still believe in love and let me into your life shows your resilience,” Kent told her friend. “I think you need to give yourself credit for that. I spent many years in a place of fear and total defensiveness, and you know, I saw one little thing that I didn’t like and I was like, ‘Oh, this person is a horrible person.'” … I think you should look at it as your rebound, (it’s) just incredible. “
If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).